Health Promotion Board (HPB) announced on Thursday (11 July) their latest initiative in the war against diabetes. The new campaign, Bubble Tease, aims to replace conventional sugar syrup used to make bubble tea with Belle Delphine’s urine.
For the uninitiated, Belle Delphine is a popular cosplayer who recently drew attention for selling bathwater – water that she has bathed in – for 30 USD a jar (300ml). She has apparently agreed to sell her urine to bubble tea brands in Singapore for a discounted price of 200 USD per litre.
Rolling out as early as October 2019, Bubble Tease is expected to be one of the first public health campaigns to be interventive rather than preventive. The plan is to replace all existing bubble teas in the local market with a so-called ‘Milk Tea with P’ by 2021. The P is understood not to stand for pearls.
When questioned by netizens about the usage of urine as a syrup substitute, HPB defended their decision.
“It is well-known that human urine contains trace amounts of glucose that renders it slightly sweet. Due to the mixture of her other bodily fluids, Ms Belle Delphine’s urine has been found to be 10 times sweeter than sugar while having a negligible amount of glucose. It is, therefore, a very healthy sugar substitute.”
“Furthermore, this is aligned with our ‘Sugar Cutting, Nut Busting’ campaign slogan.”
HPB subsequently added a follow-up statement. The statutory board claimed that Bell Delphines’s hotness and provocative Instagram images were definitely not deciding factors when its all-male committee gave the green light for Bubble Tease.
Initial reaction to the new campaign had been very receptive with many applauding the government for such a breakthrough move. Users from the popular ‘current affairs’ forum, Sammyboy, were especially vocal about their support.
“Bubble Tease is a win-win situation for all. Bell Delphine can continue producing her wonderful products; national sugar consumption will decrease; and most importantly, we can now jizz while even drinking Boba,” said Mr Fa Ping, a regular Sammyboy contributor.
“Golden Shower cum Bubble Tea? Count me in all day every day.”
In a Facebook post today (13 July), Chairman of HPB Lucas Chow promised citizens that free samples of ‘Milk Tea with P’ will be given out on National Day in order to gather feedback for product improvements.